Hey. I'm going to be a hypocrite now.

Once upon a time there was a girl, and there was the girl's best friend. The girl's best friend liked a boy, who the girl was not too fond of. But the girl saw that the girl's best friend was happy, so she didn't say anything. Things happened. Bad things happened. Eventually the girl almost lost her best friend. But then the boy and the best friend broke up.

Now, the boy had other 'girlfriends.' One of these was named Tami. I was, to the best of my recollection, always nice to Tami. I rack my brain, even now, to think of what singular, horrible offense I committed against her, save for the fact that thinking her boyfriend was a lying, jealous slug. Now, also to the best of my recollection, one should not hate another person simply because they dislike one's friends. But perhaps I am wrong, as I often am. Anyway, the whole business was dead and buried many moons ago, or so I thought. Until Tami left a lovely message in my guestbook. Here is the message:

"Sometimes I wish I was you. Is that the betraying of myself?
I gave up all rights to the freedom of my dreams when I
was thirteen.

Lucky little damn American tart."

I knew it was an insult, since I knew Tami hated me, yet I wondered why she bothered to resurface now, after so many years. So I asked the best friend in question, my oneechan Del. Del asked the boy. The boy, in turn, I suppose, asked Tami. Tami responded.

"About the guestbook message you passed on to Jade - it was an excessively bad joke that backfired. Please inform Lyn that in no way do I actually admire her or like her. In fact, please inform her I'd rather that her eyes be bitten out by rabid squirrels and that her heart be devoured by wandering goths than ever be in her presence again, and that I think her melodramatic journal's hilarious. Thank you very much! Ta-ta!"

Aww. Isn't that the sweetest sentiment you ever heard? She cares about me so much that she reads Truth! Her feelings for me run so deep that she wishes me to be eaten by squirrels! My heart is touched. I didn't know you felt so strongly for me, Tami! Tell me, darling, tell me true. If you hate me, why do you hang around kurai, as you obviously do? Why do you care what happens to me? Were you hoping to make me cry? Were you hoping to make me pull down truth and kurai and sob and moan?

Hm. No. You see, you are not my friend. Only my friends can hurt me.

Now, I'm sure that my reaction was your dearest wish, and here it is. I'm sorry if it's not what you expected, though, precious. Though really, I would just love to know what awful thing I did to make your heart burn for me so, aside from, of course, thinking your boyfriend is not a very nice man at all. Care to enlighten me?